I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
