hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
