areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize