I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
