It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
