Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
