I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
