I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
