my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Randomize
