There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize