He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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