i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
