cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
