idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
