the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
