From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I have fence marks all over my body
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
