Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I didn't notice because vodka
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
