So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
