Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
