have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
