I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
my sisters under your porch take her home
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
