Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
