I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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