Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
