I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
