It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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