whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
the room spins SO much faster in panama
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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