just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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