Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
