The maid of honor just puked.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
40s are totally the cure
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
