Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
