What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Randomize
