sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
