Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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