For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
