You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
