Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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