I wannas sexs uuuuu
She is in my trunk
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I bet he comes in French.
dude i'm inner monologue high
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
