Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
