Just cropdusted the office
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
