Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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