Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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