So drunk its hurt
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
