For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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