Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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