I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
