After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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