What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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