so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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