Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
A+ Viking dick
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
